The Gee Chronicles

Sep 242002
 

Dear Dr. Robert:

As much as it pains us to face it, none of us is getting any younger and no one can ever hope to follow in Gee’s illustrious bridge footsteps. Should we be thinking cryogenics or cloning or should we just let him take his unique and rightful place in history?

Fearful of Fate

Dear Fateful,

You are not the first to consider this fascinating concept. Medicine has investigated cloning all of the greats, from Michael Jordan to Michael Jackson, from Pavarotti to Madonna, from Dr. Ruth to Dr. Robert, and Gerard is no exception. I myself have come across images from a previous experiment to clone Gee that went horribly, horribly wrong. You should turn away at this point if you are pregnant, nursing, thinking of becoming pregnant, under the age of 18, or have a personal or family history of heart conditions.

The same in every detail, but with 1/8 the bridge skill.

Apparently there was a mixup in the petri dish, and fortunately it ended, this time, with Gerard and Mini-Gee cornered in their effort to escape the lab. This sort of experiment should be a distant memory for the sake of all our safety. And there are other difficulties. After the hand, would they each blame the other for overbidding, or would they acknowledge the lack of luck in the expert partnership? I leave this for the more philosophical brethren to ponder: If two Gees overbid, and no one is around to blame, does it still go for stix and wheels?

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