“When I make unusual bids and it works, you don’t get intimidated and you keep playing your game… the others think: if Gerard can do it, I can too… and take a fall… and drag me in their fall too.”
—praising a partner, albeit not the one he was playing with
“Small Time Club Players™ bid four hearts with that hand because they think it looks good.”
—discussing his partner’s (clearly correct) bid
“The Internet altogether is the way of the future..everything exists on here…macrocosmic and microcosmic..it is not an illusion, it is the truth of the 21st century.”
—after a couple of bong hits
“I’d be safer playing bridge with Osama.”
—discussing his partner with the specs
“Partner, when you play with me, I ask you to NOT LEAD TRUMP and NOT PLAY TRUMP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HAND…EVER.”
“90% of bidding errors are solved for those who read my book.”
“I would have found the play, had I paid more attention.”
“My affliction is partners who bid by feel instead of logic. Every game it is the same thing. The worst part is that some great players think it is me who is doing this crazy stuff and refuse to play with me after that, but if these people would read my book, they would never make this kind of bid ever again.”
“First review was that it is revolutionary.”
—asked if his book was as good as the Bergen books
“I can’t force to game, I am the dealer. I can only show you a big hand, then you decide what to do with it…responder is the only one who can make forcing bids.”